A wonderful experience in China

I was told by my brother who visited Shanghai recently that- look, our credit cards dont work there- so carry cash, veg food is an issue- so, carry ready to eat food, language is an issue, more importantly- Google does not work in China- so, buy a local sim there and install a VPN to get everything working. That was enough to scare me off.

I started planning the whole trip, including how to get to the hotel from airport, snapshots of maps (you cannot download offline maps in the China region!!), carry cash in multiple wallets, carry a power adapter and so on.

Of course, when we landed in Hangzhou, China, it met my expectations, in the sense, not a single person understood when I said "Bus", we were looking for the airport bus to reach the hotel. Luckily, I had a print out of the airport shuttle timings which had a photo of a bus- and that helped! Nobody could read English, and my hotel name/address was in English- nobody could guide us. To let us in to the bus stop, they did an explosive detection check!! Luckily, the airport bus stopped diagnoally opposite to our hotel; the hotel had the name in Chinese too- and there you go, we arrived. I must say that the Huachen International hotel was extremely good. It was like a 4-star hotel- a price of Rs.3500- we were on the 15th floor, they lent us travel adapters since ours did not work. And there were fake markets right behind the hotel! We were very close to West-lake and what else do you need!

 Then, we started exploring the place. We figured that people smoke a lot!! My God, I must have inhaled so much smoke in the one week! And the people are so uncivilised, worse than Indians! They would just barge into you, unintentionally of course. I was in this convenient store looking for a yogurt. A girl just pushed me aside, took the thing she was looking for, and went away. Many more such instances. People were jumping lines, and the worst thing was in the railway station. Guys whose train was coming up half an hour later blocked the line of the train which was coming up in 15 minutes. And there were people arguing, shouting at each other! At another store, they were just about to close, at 8.30pm, and I was still looking for some food stuff to buy, of course, trying hard to find if there was any English word written there. The lady just shouted at us in Chinese, luckily, we could not understand. But, we figured that she wanted us to buy quickly and leave. I have not seen such a thing in India. The last experience was that the cab guy managed to cheat us at least 50 Yuan (Rs 500). The station was 25 km away from the hotel and would cost 80Yuan, we knew it. The meter showed 50km and charged us 133Yuan!! And I told him that- "Look, we know it costs only 80Y and your meter shows 130Y." He quickly pointed us to another taxi and said- "Look, that one is 80Y", and as if doing charity, he charged me just 130, and not 133 :) I did not want to get into an argument in an unknown language in that country, so we got away from the situation. Anyway, he got my point that, we know he cheated us.

Anyway, coming back to tourism, we went to a place called "West Lake"- which is a popular tourist spot- and we saw nearly 5000 people there, only to realise that they were seated there for 4 hours to watch the musical fountain!! Just too many people in this country, and too many kids! We took the Dragonboat cruise on the lake- and it was so rich inside!

 We visited Lingyin temple- and it was probably one of the best tourist spots I have visited ever, We found a temple premises and thought that was it. Then we found stairs by its side- to only find that there was another temple premises above this one. Then we kept going- and found that there were 5 different levels of the Buddhist temple premises. One of them had about 100 Buddhas carved on a wall.

This temple was in a park which had rock carvings- of Laughing Buddhas etc. There was another hall which had 500 statues of Buddhist monks. We had already walked nearly 6 km and I really cannot believe I completed this visit. There were still couple more temples in the park- for which the ticket was already included, but I had no fuel left to tour. But, this is a must visit- if you are around this area.

We were to take the bullet train to Shanghai at 4pm next day and we had to collect tickets at the station. My conference was to get done at 2pm, so we thought we will take a cab, reach the station at 2.45pm, collect the tickets and leave. Then, I suddenly realised that the print out I had did not have the ticket pick up number. I then logged in to trip.com, but it sent an OTP to my gmail id which I had no access to. I had to call my brother over watsapp, give me my password which luckily I remembered, get the OTP, signin and get the pickup number. We then saw a picture of the Hangzhou railway station- it had at least 10000 people.

Then we felt, there might be huge lines for ticket pickup, so we better wake up early, get the tickets and then go to the conference. This really saved the day for us. It took an hour in the line for us to get tickets- esp because were were "aliens" (thats what they call the international passengers), and our passports had to be verified. And and, the station was atleast twice the size of Bangalore airport. The north going and south going trains were in different station terminals!! The station itself was so easy- you get through security and arrive at waiting halls on ground floor. This floor has entry to all 30 platforms. The gates open 15mins before departure and close 3 mins before. You can only enter your platform, not any other one. You go through the escalator to the -1 floor- and wait for the train, The train arrived at 4pm, people got out in a minute, and it departed at 4.03pm!! A train carried a max of 500 passengers!! The bullet train experience was cool- we traveled in first class- for about Rs.1000 at a top speed of 306 km/hr. It did not really feel like 300+.


Shanghai, no wonder, had many more people. We went well prepared, got the hotel name and address translated to Chinese, showed it to the cab guy- and yes, we had learnt the trick- how to survive and communicate in China. We went on the Huangpu river cruise- what a sight at the Bund! The Pearl tower, Financial center and there was an ICBC bank- which had 30 floors.

Then there were these fake markets outside the Science and technology museum metro stop. The museum building was so huge- with a central globe. There were at least 2000 shops at that metro- fully air conditioned- I couldnt believe it. And we had so much bargaining. I looked for a handbag- the price she quoted was 300Yuan (3000Rs). I said 30- she was shell-shocked. She said- are talking about 30 dollars? I said 30 Yuan- no kidding. And I finally got it at 35Yuan.. Ridiculous.. I bought some 2Yuan, 10 Yuan stuff, some really nice handcraftef souvenirs.

And the metro is so so phenomenol. They had 17 Lines- I could not print it out! The central People's square stop had 20 exits!! That single stop was as big as our Bangalore airport with so many facilities. On the inside of the metro, they had a good plan for showing the route- a red light would blink at the stop we were going to arrive. Green lights were blinking at the stops we have already travelled. Names of the streets, exits, metro stops were written in Chinese and English- thank god!

Lastly, we went to Zhujiajiao water town- called the Venice of the east, about 40km away from Shanghai. We traveled by metro line 17- for atleast 20 stops- cost us just 8 Yuan!! It had a Tibetan cultural museum, an old post office, a park and so on- easily you can spend the whole day there. You can wear the Chinese traditional wear for 10Y, click photos!!

Roller coaster ride!

Since it has been nearly a year since I posted anything here, it is probably worth noting the roller-coaster ride that I have had since then. I thought my PhD experience was not really as bad as described by my other fellow beings. When I joined in this programme 6 years ago, I did not know what I was planning to do with it (not that I really know now). One year into it went pretty fast with the aggressive coursework. The 2nd year went through with some initial experiments. The next 2.5 years went through with my mind mostly focusing on hostel and institute activities (council activities and a host of other related committees that I was part of), with PhD becoming a part time job. I now realize I probably did not know how to work while conserving my energy. There was no need to be so emotional and aggressive. Anyway, it is always easy to look back and say that. What happened was the right thing to have happened- is the only sure shot way of moving ahead in life!

When I ran out of energy at the end of it, I was left with probably the last leg of the PhD- a few experiments and then the writing up. The experiments were done in a month, but the paper writing seemed like never ending. It is hard to write what I went through next. But, I guess it might be useful for all those who face similar things. I was in a Womens day function and when I got out of it, my fingers started trembling- I had a sudden rush of negative energy/anxiety whatever you may want to call it. I was told that it is called - panic attack. I did not know what I was panicking about. I took some anti-anxiety pill, my BP was high etc., I do not want to relive the whole thing, but I want to write the positives that came out of this terrible experience. Trust me, you do not want to go through this.

I sat down to ask myself what is going on. In addition to this PhD, there were other things going on. I previously had so much energy that I was emotionally supporting a few people in distress not realizing that I had only finite energy and I can do only so much.
Lesson 1: First wear you own oxygen mask, before helping others with it. You need to be alive before you can rescue others.

I got it this sudden realisation (of course, not instantly. It was after a few weeks) that worrying about something is not going to help me solve the problem. The paper will finish when it has to, and my worrying about it will harm me mentally and physically and not help me in anyway. This was Lesson 2. Peace began to dawn on me. World began to look beautiful again, until I was in for a test again.

In this process, as I sat with myself, I began to realize some tendencies I had. I always used to repeat in my mind all the bad experiences I have had, and literally fight with the other person/situation in my own mind. Many of us do that- that is the nature of the mind. You see- that is such a funny thing. You are imagining yourself in a situation and fighting it in your own mind- which really only builds so much negativity in you and does not really solve any problem. That was Lesson 3. Say for example, you are at office and you are being treated unfairly by a colleague about whom you have high regards. You are completely shaken. If you are like me, you will fight for "the right cause". Too much of expecting things to be correct.. Unfortunately, the world is not so. People will do what they feel is right.. There is absolutely nothing you can do about it. I read somewhere- There is nothing you can control except your attitude towards something. That is absolutely true. How many things in this world can I control? My work, my surroundings, my friends, my boss? Yes, most of the times, you can. You can quit the job, so the surroundings and everything that comes with it will change. But when you are left with no option, the only thing you can do is to prevent it from affecting your own mind. It is no doubt tough, but it has to be done.

You can read about the issue you have, you can talk to people about it, in fact you SHOULD, you can do thousand things.. but until you have sat with yourself to ask- "What is your problem, why are you in trouble"- kind of questions and address them with a positive mindset, trust me, nothing will change. The problem in not outside, it it is one's own mind and it has to be solved using your own intellect. That was Lesson 4- and the biggest lesson.

These experiences are tough for someone who has especially not undergone really tough times in life- I mean, emotionally or mentally tough times. For whatever reason these came in, Lesson 5 was: Take the positives, forget the rest. What a ride it has been!

A trip to Assam

It took longer in a flight to reach Assam than it would to reach Singapore probably. We were travelling from Mumbai. But having gone the distance, it was worth it! I have never seen such lush-green scenery from the flight, before landing in an airport. We landed in Guwahati, and it was hard to find a place which was not green. I later realized that, it is green not just around the airport, but it is green probably anywhere else you travel in Assam! The first thing I noted was that, vehicles had an "AS" registration :)
I had a similar surprise when I first landed in Mumbai six years ago, to find "MH" everywhere. It was a huge surprise, especially given that one is used to seeing "KA" all life!

From there, we went to the railway station and then to the Umananda temple. It was really disappointing to see that the station was in such primitive conditions, the drains were not well maintained, the Brahmaputra was probably overflowing, but had garbage in it. There is huge scopes for development, and at the same time, people who visit should also be responsible enough to throw garbage in the right place. It is NOT ok to throw a banana peel out on the streets from your vehicle and it is NOT ok to be spitting on the road every 5 minutes.

The Umananda temple is the world's smallest inhabited riverine island, and it takes about 10 minutes for you to reach it through a boat. They will charge you huge money (~Rs 500) to get you there and get you back, unless you go on a shared boat. The ride is beautiful if it is not raining!

The best part about the trip was the tea estates, which you get to see everywhere. On our journey from Dibrugarh to Kaziranga (~250 km), I saw tea estates on either sides of the road for nearly 200 km. And they really look infinite. I never knew that the color 'green' could be so appealing to the mind. Every house I spotted had a green path to the entrance of the house from the gate. And every time I spotted a cow, it was a set of at least 100 cows, and I kept thinking that they are them ost fortunate of all other cows to be eating grass and not paper or plastic. The tea estates and the cows are the best part of Assam, which I would remember for a long time.


We stayed in a 'United 21' resort near Bagori range of Kaziranga. Kaziranga is spread across 4 ranges (~100 km in total). The hotel arranged for a jeep safari, and the entrance is about 2 km from this hotel. Its an "Open" jeep safari. It is ok to spot a rhino or an elephant or a wild buffalo, but am not sure how people are so daring to see a tiger from such a jeep! I am glad we did not spot one! The whole safari took about 3 hours and they charge you about Rs.2000 per jeep. The more the people per jeep, the better for you, you can save some money. And again here, you will just seen green, green, green everywhere, apart from the water!

This national park apparently hosts 75% of the world's one-horned Rhino population. Probably, there are more Rhinos here, than there are humans! The Rhino really looks so majestic. And yes, the national park is open on Sundays too, unlike other posts we had read saying that it is closed on Sundays. Then there are 3 slots for an Elephant safari: 5am, 6am and 7am, and it takes about 1 hour. They charge you Rs. 875 per person. And oh yes, the sun rises in this part of the world at around 4am :) You can hardly sleep beyond 5.30am, as the room gets so bright! We really need to have a different time zone setting here! And beyond 6pm, you can not do much, its dark, and may mostly rain (April to Nov)

If you are near Kaziranga, there is a must do thing apart seeing the Rhino. You need to see the Orchid park, which was ~16km from the 'United 21' resort. They have really promoted tourism the right way. They have the best collection of orchids in the North-east. By the way, while I was in Assam, I heard the word 'North-east' so many times.. I did not know it was a heavily used word here, and that these states are called 'North-east'. I did not know they had such a terminology.

Coming back to the orchids, they have a HUGE collection in the greenhouse, and have a huge park outside the greenhouse, where you can spot orchids. The photo along-side (the yellow flower) is called the 'dancing lady" for obvious reasons, and the one above is known to look like a lady's show! There is also a photo gallery of orchids, and a seed-house that shows the 200 varieties of rice that grows there! The best part of this Orchid garden is, there is a Bamboo dance and Bihu dance performance that goes on every one hour. The bamboo dance is really worth watching. They portray the harvesting season, and collection of seeds from the plants. I was really happy to see all of these things in one place, and the Rs.200 entry fee is really more than worth it.

Coming to the resort where we stayed, the 'United 21' resort, it had an extremely well maintained garden. And if not for this resort, we would not have any other place to eat, around that place! And the food was unbelievably good, and reasonable given that all ingredients and vegetables have to come from a place which is at least 30-40 km away. And since this resort is situated in a "remote" area, with absolutely no way of transport apart from the resort jeep, the commuting costs you a lot, so have some cash along with you! You may need to travel ~10 km to find an ATM :)

Lastly, we did see the famous Kamakhya temple. We were in fact lucky that we went at 1pm, and the main entry was closed, so we did not have to stand in the long queues. We got to see the main deity from inside another adjacent entrance. But, the sights in the temple such as the goddess holding animals in her hands, and goats being carried for "sacrifice" is something that we South Indians are not used to seeing or not comfortable with, to be honest. There is a HUGE difference in the "feel" you get in visiting a South Indian temple and one in the North. A "priest" was giving the pooja flowers, and the next thing he asked was to put money in the plate next to him. There were only 100 and 500 rupee notes on that plate. Of course, I did not give.

One last thing to mention is, we returned to Mumbai via Kolkata airport. And I must confess that I had not seen such a huge and beautiful and well maintained airport in the recent past in India (apart from the Mumbai airport T2). It was pleasing to see that it won the 'best improved airport in APAC region' in 2012 and 2013. No long queues either in the checkin/security counters. Things are improving and it is glad to see..

Ajanta- Ellora

Who does not want to visit Ajanta and Ellora caves?
A small problem in planning a visit to these caves is that, they are not really close to each other, they are about 4 hours apart. So, in order to visit Ajanta, we reached Jalgaon, and traveled for about an hour to reach Ajanta caves. You are welcomed by a huge set of shops that sell amazing items- glasswork, pottery etc., You will be then led to the caves by a guide. It is highly advisable to hire a guide, else you will not be able to figure out much! Be careful to carry enough electrolytes and water with you, especially in summer. It can be terrible!

Ajanta has about 30 caves, and you can see a view of almost all caves in this picture. Its an amazing view. You wont have time to visit all of them in detail in a single day. The guide will take you through at least 10 of them.



The key highlight of these caves, is the painting on the ceilings, but they were destroyed by people who attacked them long ago.. And there's a really HUGE Buddha statue in the last cave. Save your energy, till the end! The journey through the caves involves some amount of climbing up and down, and you can really feel like you will not make it to the last cave, which is really the amazing one!





One sad part of these caves, is that it is not really as well maintained as it should be. The entry fee is very minimal, something like Rs.50 or so, (don't really remember). And some caves can be really suffocating. These kind of caves are really the treasures of our country, which are unfortunately not well taken care of.

We then took off to Aurangabad which is nearly 4 hours from Jalgaon. The bus transport system is really pathetic there. You can hire an auto from Aurangabad to Ellora- which is about 30km away.
Ellora is a different type of cave than Ajanta. You need to use transport to travel from one cave to another. We were really able to see just one cave- cave number 16- apparently the biggest one, and the most amazing one.
 

It took us few hours to just complete this one cave. Again, mindblowing art-work and sculptures. Very intricate work can be seen in these caves.
 
You can also see bats flying around you, which is unfortunate. It was disgusting to see poorly lit caves.. we had to use the flash in our phones to find our way inside some parts of the cave. The air was so stale, and there is hardly any ventilation inside some caves. Again, an indication of some poor maintenance. The entry fee was Rs.10. I would strongly recommend to the tourism ministry to consider increasing the fee, and providing some better maintenance and facilities for visitors.
If you are at Ellora, you may want to visit Ghrishneshwar Jyotirlinga temple, which is just a 10 minute walk from the Ellora entrance. They wont let you carry your phones inside the temple! You will need to deposit them outside.. Dont bother buying flowers.. I have a doubt that they recycle it :)

Overall, Ajanta- Ellora is a must watch if you appreciate sculptures and understand art. You can easily cover the whole trip in 4 days, if you are travelling from Mumbai.

Ajanta- Ellora

Who does not want to visit Ajanta and Ellora caves?
A small problem in planning a visit to these caves is that, they are not really close to each other, they are about 4 hours apart. So, in order to visit Ajanta, we reached Jalgaon, and traveled for about an hour to reach Ajanta caves. You are welcomed by a huge set of shops that sell amazing items- glasswork, pottery etc., You will be then led to the caves by a guide. It is highly advisable to hire a guide, else you will not be able to figure out much! Be careful to carry enough electrolytes and water with you, especially in summer. It can be terrible!

Ajanta has about 30 caves, and you can see a view of almost all caves in this picture. Its an amazing view. You wont have time to visit all of them in detail in a single day. The guide will take you through at least 10 of them.



The key highlight of these caves, is the painting on the ceilings, but they were destroyed by people who attacked them long ago.. And there's a really HUGE Buddha statue in the last cave. Save your energy, till the end! The journey through the caves involves some amount of climbing up and down, and you can really feel like you will not make it to the last cave, which is really the amazing one!





One sad part of these caves, is that it is not really as well maintained as it should be. The entry fee is very minimal, something like Rs.50 or so, (don't really remember). And some caves can be really suffocating. These kind of caves are really the treasures of our country, which are unfortunately not well taken care of.

We then took off to Aurangabad which is nearly 4 hours from Jalgaon. The bus transport system is really pathetic there. You can hire an auto from Aurangabad to Ellora- which is about 30km away.
Ellora is a different type of cave than Ajanta. You need to use transport to travel from one cave to another. We were really able to see just one cave- cave number 16- apparently the biggest one, and the most amazing one.
 

It took us few hours to just complete this one cave. Again, mindblowing art-work and sculptures. Very intricate work can be seen in these caves.
 
You can also see bats flying around you, which is unfortunate. It was disgusting to see poorly lit caves.. we had to use the flash in our phones to find our way inside some parts of the cave. The air was so stale, and there is hardly any ventilation inside some caves. Again, an indication of some poor maintenance. The entry fee was Rs.10. I would strongly recommend to the tourism ministry to consider increasing the fee, and providing some better maintenance and facilities for visitors.
If you are at Ellora, you may want to visit Ghrishneshwar Jyotirlinga temple, which is just a 10 minute walk from the Ellora entrance. They wont let you carry your phones inside the temple! You will need to deposit them outside.. Dont bother buying flowers.. I have a doubt that they recycle it :)

Overall, Ajanta- Ellora is a must watch if you appreciate sculptures and understand art. You can easily cover the whole trip in 4 days, if you are travelling from Mumbai.

The beautiful islands of Madeira - a travel blog

Well, you must see it to believe it. Initially, I thought, an island must be really having nothing but sea on one side and beaches.. What else can it have?

The city is literally carved out of the mountains. Its quite easy to catch a look at these houses on the mountains.. they have the typical orange brick top, that is, they are thatched roof-houses. I was wondering how did these houses get on top of these slopes.. only to realise that, whoever built the city, have literally carved roads on these mountains. 

Something very common to every house is the huge balconies, the typical thatched roofs, a ventilator- the dark green one (almost 99% of the houses have this and only this kind of ventilator). The apartments have huge balconies and are extremely well ventilated, that is, they have sliding doors and windows along the length of the wall.. Almost 99% of the apartments you can see around in this place have this feature.
And the blue ocean will follow you everywhere..

And my goodness.. on the mountains, along with the houses, you can see banana plantations everywhere. No, in fact, there are banana plantations in a step-wise fashion on the mountains, and amidst these plantations, houses are situated. The houses are just flanked by these plantations.. and the size of these bananas is about 10 inches long!!

Its a picture-book city.. if you ever did a painting or planning for a movie depicting to set up a city, this is how it would be.. everything seems perfect, everything in the right place! There are tunnels carved into these mountains, and roads built for accessibility. And they have made the best of the place, by converting the entire island into a tourist spot. They have divided the island into different parts and the maps show different tours you could do. You can find a souvenir shop in almost every shop and every street.. which is quite remarkable.

Apart from the bananas, they grow grapes.. and from there comes their wine!! Vegetarian food- they do not know what that means.. so if you are a vegetarian, carry your food.. or survive on fruits, juice, dry salad and some yoghurt. Water is unheard of.. just kidding. They take more alcohol than water, so you have to pay for water!!

Take a moment off.. to know how fortunate you are

We all have problems in life, or atleast, we think so. What is a problem?
We are caught in the small petty jealousies, fights, hatreds, ego or superiority complexes and such things..

Somebody comments on my dress, I have a problem. I develop a complex to wear the same dress the same way next time.

Some remote "friend" says, "I dont need you anymore".. I get a serious heart-attack and think that, my world is full of misery. I think "What was my mistake? What have I ever done to deserve this?"

I do not respond to someone and the person says something rudely, I feel that no one cares for me. A friend does not wish me on my birthday and I feel that something terrible has happened in my life. My dad cares for me a lot that he is so so protective about me, even at this age. He still thinks I cannot cross the street on my own, and I have a problem with him! My friend says she will ping me back and doesn't, I have a problem with it. I started hating her, that she is so egoistic and I should not ping her anymore! I build jealousy within myself.

I do well in my job, and someone is jealous about it and wants to pull me down. I still have to pretend that I am a good friend of her, and I think that I am in a serious problem.

Wait a minute..

Think about this.

Someone is an orphan, she doesnt want to show it. She has accepted this fact and has moved on in life. SHE is the one who has nobody to care for her and she still lives strong. She does not think that she has a problem.

Someone has got a real heart-break. His love has married someone else! And this guy is still very good friends with both of them! THAT is strength. HE is the one who has real worries, misery and is still getting on with life. He has accepted it and has moved on. It is so difficult for me, to imagine this guys position. It is easy to imagine that he is in misery. But it is so difficult for me to imagine that he is still happily friendly with the other 2 people! Unimaginable strength. I say, WOW! I have seen people who start hating the two people, but to love them to the same extent, hats off, I say! 

Someone's husband has passed away. She has 3 kids and knows no one who can help her. She is uneducated. She has still found a job and is feeding those 3 kids. That is called, problem.

Just visit a cancer hospital. People will be lying on the road-side, in their final stages of life, unable to pay for their treatment. Probably, they are even begging people for money and we think that they are anyway not going to get cured, so why pay. Those are the people who have real problem.

There are people who cannot feed themselves for 2 times a day, who cannot afford to pay for their living, who beg on the streets.. those are the ones who have problems. They do not even have the time to think of hatreds, jealousies etc.,

And what are we doing? We have everything. We eat 4 to 5 or even 6 times a day! We have such good parents to take extra care of us. We dont even have to prepare a meal, it is almost always ready-made! We are quite well educated, thanks to our parents, so that we earn our living. We have money and we do not think, it is enough! We always want more, and it is never enough. We have so many clothes to wear and we still think that we do not have good ones! We buy something that we think is good and the next day, we feel that it is not so good! What are we searching happiness in? Why have we become so petty?

When we die, we die alone. None of the money, dresses, palaces, jeweleries, degrees, medals and lastly, not even our friends or the loved ones are going to come with us. We need to be happy with some things and get on in life, instead of complaining on petty things. Try to take a moment off to see all the nice things you have.. and you will realise how fortunate you are. We have everything we need. We only need to take time off to observe those things, instead of wasting our lives on things we DO NOT need. If not anything else, I have two eyes and can see! THAT, is for me, the most important thing in life. To be able to see, is why, I think, I am very fortunate :)

Need for critical judgement

We see something and we get carried away and then realise that the thing is not the same thing that we initially thought it to be. I have had this experience several times. I see a dress and get so carried away that I think that I HAVE to buy it. I buy it. I wear it and then find that, it was not that great after all. Then was it my imagination that the dress was good? Or may be I just didnt know that the color wouldnt suit me. We look at some food material and think that it must be tasty and take a lot of it. We then find that the food is not tasty at all and we should not have got carried away. How many times have we not experienced something similar to this?

So, how do we fix this? We should use our judgement always. We should always be completely aware of what we are doing.

We are very fond of one more habit. Taking opinions about something or someone. We always need opinions. We are scared to try it out on our own and experiment it. For eg., it happened to me when I was deciding to leave Intel and join for Ph.D at IITB. And this happened to me, when I had already got an admit, and had just about enough time to resign. The fear of the unknown. Should I need to do a Ph.D? Is leaving Intel the right decision? Is going away from home worth it? Do I need this change now? Where am I heading?
So, ideally I should have thought about all this before applying for the institute. But I thought, "let me try it. If I get an admit, I will decide later." Then when it came to the time when I had to make a decision, I started talking to people. The first person I talked to, said- "Ph.D? Why?Do you want to become an academician? Do you know what you will do with it? If not, you should not go. Leaving Intel and going? Who will leave Intel? This IS the place to be. You can always do research here if you are motivated. Why do you have to quit? You get a good pay. You stay at home. What makes you think that you should leave all this?"

I had about few days to put down my papers, to meet the required notice period. Considering the above advice, it made me think a lot of things. I tried to answer each of those questions to myself. And I couldnt convince myself. I tried to see if there is some way in which I can get the best of all worlds- that is- to stay at Intel, to do a PhD, and to be at my hometown. First step, I spoke to my manager if there is some way in which I can pursue this while staying at Intel., that is, if they can give me a leave of absence for an year to complete my coursework and then I would do the Ph.D part-time. My manager and his boss asked me - "Why should I do this favor to you? You might be extraordinary, but if I do this to you, others will also ask me. You better leave. And you are always welcome if you want to rejoin. I have done favors to your colleagues earlier. They all took the favor, ditched us and left. What is the guarantee that you will not do the same?"

I was stunned at the way in which these people spoke. I thought, "He is asking me to leave. I will not leave. I will speak to higher authorities." Meanwhile, time was running out. So, I requested for a deferral in my admission, by a semester, so that I could take a decision in the meantime.

I went upto the level of the Intel India President. There are these extended education support programs, and they never work beyond the paper on which the guidelines are written. So, I spoke to him if this can be supported. He suggested that I speak to different teams who are willing to take me in and sponsor my leave and Ph.D as well. Like an idiot, I spoke to a few team managers. They asked me what area I was going to work on. I had no idea at that time. In fact, even after 1.5 years after coming to IITB, I still have no idea!! They took my interview.. and I had no clue what they were talking. They said that it doesnt make sense for them to increase a headcount and send her on leave. So, they suggested that I quit and then come back after a year if I wish.

I spoke to atleast 10 managers and got the same response. I was fed up. It was about 4 months of discussion and thinking by now. Every day, I used to discuss at home, on what direction I need to take and what makes sense. I used to discuss in the bus on the way back home. I probably spoke to 50 people within Intel, out of which only 2 people suggested strongly that I SHOULD quit Intel and go at any cost.
I said that I am not finding strong reasons to quit Intel. They said that they can help me with that!! :-)

Out of the 50 discussions, some are worth quoting. One of them was an IITB graduate several years ago. He took an interview and asked me some basics about capacitors, transistors etc.,. I couldnt answer convincingly. Of course, if you are at Intel for about 5 years, you would have lost all confidence in yourself, that you wouldnt even know how a MOSFET works. So, he gave his verdict- "See, you dont even know the basics. What Ph.D will you do? If you leave Intel now, are you confident that you can get a job here again after you are done? No.(he had decided it for me). So, why do you leave? My guide also calls me and asks me to join for Ph.D. I am also from IITB. But I am happy here, making lots of money. I like circuit design and I have published lots of papers, which I will do if I join for Ph.D too. But with the stipend they pay, I cant look after my family and kids. So, why should I suffer there? I like teaching and for that, I dont have to quit Intel. I take evening courses on basics here at Intel. You can attend my classes and strengthen your basics. Dont leave Intel. Ultimately your Ph.D guide will also look at you like a resource, who will work for him. It is similar to industry in that sense. So, whats the fun?"

Many views were similar to this. But there was one guy who said- "Part-time may not be a good option unless you have no other way. We have financial and family committments. So, we do part-time. If you have no such committments, you should do it full-time. But again, it is my opinion. You should do what you feel like doing". This was the only person who gave me this advice.

Then, I finally met one manager in analog design team who was ready to hire me and send me on a leave. He was leaving to the US. So, he was in a hurry and left. The next day, I was supposed to mail him my decision. I came home. I slept in the evening and woke up after a while. I thought, enough is enough. I will quit. The next day, I spoke to the big boss asking him when would he relieve me. He said- "You can go tomorrow itself, if you want". I thought, I should have gone long ago. Anyway, enough was enough! That day, I made a decision and I didnt have any emotions after that or any questions if that decision was right. Even when I left home, I didnt have emotions, considering the fact that I had gone through 5 months of highly emotional thinking about which way to go.

I came here to IITB in Jan 2011. I checked out the department. The first week of classes- impressive. I could absorb the vibrations of the department! I found that it was awesome. In a couple of weeks, I knew that it is great to be here. By the end of the semester, I grew so much in confidence that I knew that I had made the right decision. I had almost 98% chances of not joining, given the different opinions of people that I had heard. But somehow, something brought me to this place, made me meet the "people" that I HAD to meet (I had no option :-)) and have the experiences that I HAD to have. That something, I call God :-) Since we do not see that unknown force, for lack of better words, we call him God. Well, I thank God. Immensely. That I am here today. If not for anything else, my sense of judgement has grown. My level of confidence has grown. I can now THINK. Yes, I can now think on my own. Even here, I have been carried away by a lot of things, but I have got my judgement back.

We need to be able to see things as they are. That is important. And that is THE MOST important lesson that I have learnt in life. We should not get carried away by anything or anybody. I repeat. We need to be able to see things as they are. When we do this, nothing can deceive us. Our perception will be clear. We can use our judgement properly and make the right decision for us to be happy. Ultimately that is what matters.

Here, I tend to think that Professors are Gods and we HAVE to follow their way, when I get carried away by some Prof's teaching. But again, that is wrong. I should not accept something just because a senior Prof says. I can always question and have my own view. Who knows? The Prof might learn something from my way of thinking. We NEED fresh ways of looking at the same old things. That is why we need young and fresh minds and encourage these youngsters to do research in Indian universities. If all the talent from the IITs goes to foreign universities, how will India move ahead? The talent was after all, from India. Why cant it make India a better nation?

Make mistakes, thats fine. Sometimes I felt that I should not have taken those extra 6 months to make a decision to leave Intel. But unless I did that, I wouldnt have learnt my lessons. It is important to learn, no matter how much time it takes. And it is important to grow. I might negate my entire time at Intel and call it useless.. but it was required, to help me negate that strong addiction that I had for Intel, that it was THE only place to be. No, there are better places :-)
Similarly, now I feel the same for IITB. But I am more careful when I make such decisions or strong feelings. The thing is that, when you are carried away, you are not aware of it at that time. That is when you need friends or people close to you to say that. It might be harsh, but you need to be made aware of the fact that you are being carried away. Whether you listen to them or not is a different question. But you need such friends who are your well-wishers and whom you trust. Then you will be more watchful and not make mistakes. Else, there is no other way. You will have to go through the tough experiences, make mistakes and learn some day. There is no other way buddy! This is the way through this world :-)

I am not saying that, you should not discuss anything with anyone. You SHOULD. Discuss by all means. But remember that those opinions were THEIR OPINIONS. It is what THEY would have done, for their own reasons, if they were in your position. That is it. It does not define what YOU should do in your current position. I am still not angry at those people who gave me such opinions. But I was such a fool to listen to them and get worried about my decision for those few months. Again, thank God that I could take the right decision or the decision that turned out to be right :-)
Discussions might give you ideas. It might help you improve many a times. Take those back home. And make your own decision. You are a different personality from them. How can you live the life someone else lived or is living? If you get a fever, you need to take a treatment for fever which suits you. A tablet that suited someone else for fever MAY NOT suit you. And all fevers need not indicate that you have the same disease!
The point is that, dont get carried away. Use your judgement. Make your decisions. Be responsible for it. At every step. Be aware of yourself.
You have your own brain. You have your own intellect. And you have your own personality and individuality! Live it up!

Selfishness or selflessness

 Ultimately, everyone is trying to be happy and they think they need some people to share themselves with.. that is human tendency anyway. And yes, sharing with people can make a huge difference in one's life. Take any relation, for example, mother-child relationship. People say that it is the most unselfish relation.. but wait, think about it. Why does a mother care for her child so much? Because she has made that child her whole world and she gets happiness out of it.. so she wants to take care of her child. But, of course, there might be some amount of selflessness. Say for instance, when a child is just born or a few weeks old, she takes a lot of care, spending sleepless nights, just so that the child gets good sleep. It is her responsibility anyway.. But I am not sure if I have to call it selfishness/selflessness/love..

 Tell your mom or dad something that they dont really agree with, will they still treat you the same loving way? Never. You will be the cause of great distress to them. They would still care for you, but you would be the one on whom they will let out all anger. But that is understandable..since poor thing that your mom is, she is helpless, who can she share herself with other than you? And tell her something she feels happy about, and now, all of a sudden, you can see all the love pouring on you. 

We talk to people, spend time with them, lots of time. Why? Because we enjoy doing it. We like their company. As simple as that. And when we find people who fit better into the kind of personality that we would like to share ourselves with, we tend to enjoy the earlier company much lesser. That's human tendency. Infact, we might find the earlier friends much sillier. Such things do happen. After all, our mind today is not the same mind tomorrow. If you enjoy something today, you need not enjoy the same thing tomorrow. Everyday, you create your own world and you enjoy your own things according to your needs. So, you really do not know if this world that you see today is a part of your imagination or if you  yourself are a part of the imagination of someone else's world!

People use this word called "selfless love". I really wonder what that means at all. If someone loves someone else, or something, it is because, again, they feel happy about it. It is again, for happiness. A dad cares so much for his daughter, out of the so-called love, because he needs her, and he has made her happiness as his happiness.. If there is nothing that can make a friend happy, and if there is nothing that you will get out of such a friend, and nothing that you should expect, would you still love such a person? If you do, then you are really selfless. There is nothing that you truly want, because you are complete in yourself already, you are at your peak of happiness already. That can happen only if you have realised the ultimate goal of life, that is true and permanent happiness, not before. If you are experiencing such selflessness before that, it only means that you are in some kind of a hallucination!

At the end of all these experiences, then comes this grand-old question. What is life? And why are we here! And the question has a quite grand-old answer too!

If we look at it from our current plane of existence, we only have to say that, our so-called nature is "imperfect" and we are here to let the karma work itself out. In the process, we go through these experiences, and the grand hope is that, we learn something out of these experiences, which hardly is the case. Anyway, we have to learn, now or later. And unless our nature evolves and becomes completely free, there is no escape from these experiencies. So, we better learn.

WE need to evolve, and all relationships have to evolve. Why? To set ourselves free, to become independent of anything and anybody. 

And only then, you will be able to truly enjoy that feeling of solitude! 

Strength.. Freedom

It is said that strength is life and weakness is death. We should have strength and at the same time, it is important to discover that the strength lies within us. We are and we should be our greatest strength, just that we dont realise it. It is quite natural for we, human beings to depend on someone or identify someone else as our strength- it could be your mother, father, sister, brother, husband, child or a friend. But it is very important to be independent, atleast to gradually get there.  

If one can find happiness in depending on something or someone for strength, how much more happiness lies in discovering the strength that lies within oneself. Just a spark of that inner strength from your own soul can ignite a whole bunch of lives and make their lives happy. The belief and confidence that, "I can achieve anything", "I can solve any problem", "I can do anything", lets you discover so much freedom. Yes, strength and freedom are related..

That is why they say, expansion is life and contraction is death.. The more strength you have, the more you express it and shower it on other's lives.. so you kind of expand yourself. Theres also a saying that- 'the moment you touch the hearts of others, is the moment you truly start living'.. And you can do so only if you expand yourself, only if you firstly have that strength in you..

That is the only way.. There should be no place for weakness. "Na ayam aatma balaheenena labhyah" (This atma cannot be realised by the weak).. There is only one goal and the goal is FREEDOM. And every atom, every being is knowingly or unknowingly marching towards that goal. The more you give up weakness.. ok, now what is weakness? Anything that drags your heart down is weakness. Anything that doesnt guarantee you permanent happiness is not strength..The more you overcome the hurdles in your own minds, the more you realise that freedom in yourself. All imaginations, weaknesses, strength- all these are states of the mind that one experiences.. When all your tendencies are converted into strength and only strength, then, the personality of the being changes and you realise that happiness lies within, in subtler things than grosser things. The more you "move" towards the inner being, the more free you get..

Getting beyond..

I should probably edit my blog name as 'the heart speaks' instead of 'the mind speaks'..

I was thinking, what really matters in life. What should really matter to me?
In this world, everything is so so so relative with respect to each other's minds. Something that is perfect to me is not perfect for you.

To consider an example:
In an educational institution where thousands of students are graduating, each one with a certain grade, and at the end of it, what does it really mean. Is it that, I got in and got out with a certain grade, got placed in some company, and then again do something there to earn some money, finally get out of there. One fine day, we get out of this world too.. And so.. what did we do at the end of it?

I feel that, someone other than 'myself' cannot quantify the quality of the effort I have put in into some work. To be precise, lets say I make a project report of 6 pages, which is really a result of hard work of about 6 months. Only I know, how much effort I have put in and if I have really put in. People could make a 6 page report in 1 day or even few hours. So, if someone external to me sees the report, he can see only the 6 pages. And again, if those 6 pages are not appealing to the person's mind, he might throw it away as rubbish. So, the point is, should I let someone else judge me or my ability or my work? My ability could be to some extent judged by someone who I consider as my 'teacher', since he knows much better than I do; and I have accepted him as my teacher to lead me to something higher. But, there is no way that someone else can really know how much effort I put in into my work. So, if they consider it as rubbish, should I even care?

And especially when it comes to grading in educational institutions, it has been my observation in the last few months that there is nothing perfect here. Each Professor has his own style of grading because each one has his own idea of the so called bloody perfection of the subject. And a 100% in that subject means what? Does it mean the person knows everything? I have seen students doing nothing, almost copying the assignments from each other and scoring almost 95%, where as a sincere student also scores the same. So, what does it mean? That, it is better to just copy and not spend time on the given job sincerely? Does sincerity have any place in this relative world at all?


So, what does this all lead me to? There could be two conclusions, which are way different:
1. Be like everyone else, just chill! Do things at the last moment, dont be sincere. It doesnt really matter in life!

2. All that matters is satisfaction to myself. Have I done my best? Have I done my job that I was supposed to do? Basically, have I been true to myself, my conscience? If my conscience says yes, then nothing else should matter to me. I shouldnt care if I am compared with someone who hasnt done his job as sincerely but ends up getting the same rewards as I do. Basically, it leads me to the conclusion that, I just do my job 'perfectly' with respect to my own conscience and if I know for myself that I have given my everything, I should learn to dettach myself from the results of it. If I can do that, I can go beyond work. At the end of the 'day', how long am I going to keep working? As long as I am in this world, I have to work, do something or the other, where inevitably I will be 'judged'. And there will be no escape from it. So, do we ever get out of it? get beyond it? where to? and how? what are we here for? to get grades? for someone to certify that I am good? Thats so funny! That shows how small a creature I am, if I am waiting for someone to certify my work and my quality and to get bogged down by these things! I should of course do good. Now, good is also relative.. good with respect to what?



So, where does relativity end? Do we ever get to the 'absolute' good? Who decides it? It gets very tough to express all this beyond this point.. Now, lets say, we look at life as a whole. We come in, do something and die and move on from there.. and repeat it. Till when? Till we get beyond the circle of life and work and death. Till we have expectations and desires, there is no way out. Till we are attached to these little things and their results, there is no escape. Get beyond it.. does it mean that I stop working? If I continue to work as if it is my duty to do so, and do my best sincerely, and get dettached from the results, then there is a possibility of an escape from the circle of work. This is what has been said in Gita and other places. I used to wonder, how can you work without expectation, what does it even mean? If I start off saying I dont want anything, I cant even work, there wouldnt be enough motivation. But I now realised that, work is inevitable, it has to be done. As long as we work, we put in some effort and we get some results. That is also inevitable. But if I continue to work because I want more out of it, working further will also be inevitable. The way out, is to realise that - God/whatever you call it- your own conscience really knows your intentions. He is the unbiased judge- the so called bestower of the results of your actions. If he is pleased, you dont have to bother about anything else. And of course, to please him, you have to be sincere. So, what do I get out of it? Satisfaction. You dont have to ask anyone to check if you are satisfied. You somehow know it for yourself. All that matters should ideally be: Have I done my best? Have I given it my everything? Have I enjoyed doing it? Did I like it? The results should be given up, meaning, you shouldnt be bothered about anything else that you get out of work except the above mentioned things. Because, there is no such thing in life as- 'you HAVE to get it'. There is no such big deal here in this mortal existence. Just imagine, all that you call as you and yours here, now, will be gone into ashes one day. It might sound dramatic, and I might sound like a pessimist; but that is a fact. So, if you are mentally prepared to have this 'mentality' (!) of giving up, here and now, then you really go beyond the small grades and reports and work and this mortal existence as a whole.


When you do this repeatedly, your mind becomes free from expectations and desires, and it really becomes "free".. You begin to realise that life is not to be bound by small, silly things such as comparing yourself with others, feeling jealous about others success, feeling bad when one doesnt get a promotion at work or when one doesnt get good marks in a certain exam or when someone doesnt praise you or if you aren't given importance etc.. These things start to look very silly. And the people who care for such silly things start to look silly. And on top of all this, the whole system that we have in this world, where everything gets judged everywhere- education, work etc., and the people who judge, the whole system looks very silly. I can stand on top of it and laugh at it. At the end of this 'life', I should have gotten over this tiny existence.. And I think, that is why we are here for. Not to get stuck here like in a whirlpool, but to find a way to get over. And as we can see, it is not so easy. That is the real challenge and that is the real and the ultimate examination. If I can get a 100% in this task, I should be done forever, with everything.. I can get an 'ideal' certificate! That is how I think, there is this only one way of getting beyond...

A heart

I see so much of a distinction between an animal (like a dog/cow etc) and a human. I saw a cow limping, walking in the middle of the road; nobody caring for it. I saw a hungry dog, that was looking for food inside a dustbin and it looked up at me expecting something. I saw some kind of helplessness in its eyes, looked as if it was making some kind of request. I looked straight into its eyes, and I felt I was connected with it, I felt sorry, helpless. I had just had my dinner, ready-made dinner, cooked by someone else, neatly served on plates, have someone else to wash my plates, and on top of it we still complain that the food is not good, it was a little less saltish, less hot etc.,. I saw another dog rolling in the sand, sleeping in the sun. Why is there so much distinction made between man and an 'animal'? Man has dominated the whole world, thinks he rules it. We study, build institutes, work, do lots and lots of things to "enjoy" at the cost of others happiness, many a times. We can go to any extent, hurting others, killing others, killing animals and eating them.. god save human beings.

Still, what should be that quality of a man that makes this really big distinction, worth it? What should he possess, that makes him worthy of being called a human being, who is rated way way above the other species. I think, it is the "heart". Care for others,  forget your egos and have a heart.. They say that, when you touch the heart of others is the moment you truly start living..Otherwise, what is 'life' after all? When can you say, you are really living?

How many times have we faced this- we dont care for those who care so dearly for us, because we take them for granted. We dont care to listen to them, they are like our secondary priority, whom we will finally resort to, when we feel alone and lost in this world.. We still, dont care to stop for a moment and feel grateful for them. We never said a thanks..Some relationships dont need a thanks, of course.. like that of a child feeling grateful towards parents. This is a really great example, of how most kids dont care for those who really care for them. I feel, this is the only true relationship amongst all the vanishing ones and I care for that relationship a lot..

Thats ok, but this is the funny part- we care a LOT for those who dont care for us.. This is one more very strange quality that I find in human beings. I heard an incident, where a girl was dumped by his boyfriend who proudly wrote that -'finally, I got rid of her'.. and the girl committed a suicide. Can it get more stupid? When a person doesnt value the relationship anymore, there's no point in the other person valuing it anymore either, so much to an extent of committing a suicide. I believe that, people who do not deserve to be given importance, should not be given importance at any cost. Basically, the root cause of all this is that, we are attached to something or somebody and our ego comes in the way of accepting this fact, which leads to agony and anguish. If we just keep things simple, there shouldnt be any worry in this world.

So, coming back to my original point, have a heart.. a simple one..care for others, tell those little thanks, little sorries, little smiles, share those little feelings, feel I say, feel.. and you are on your way to justify, why humans are really supposed to be way ahead of all other species. A dog shows gratitude, it can feel. In fact, all living beings can..(Btw, I dont mean to underestimate a dog or any other animal. Just that I see so many of them everyday, I am just using them as an example. In many cases and in many ways, dogs are much better than humans!)
If you lack a heart, then I am sorry, you are worse than any other creature on this planet, just spending one more day on earth..

Marriage!

Well, I never thought I would be writing about it one day. But today was a different experience! Something I never imagined before. I never became a huge fan of a person just by hearing at his speech, and that too listening to a few minutes, I wanted to go and tell him, 'you are awesome'! And what's more, I recorded his speech (not sure if it was legal) and I am quoting him here in my blog.

If you have been wondering what I am talking about.. here it is.. I attended a wedding in a church today, for the first time in my life. Initially, I was comparing the differences between the cultures. I saw people with pianos, people getting ready to play songs, people with guitar on the stage etc., I had imagined the bride walking down in white dress and all (like we have seen in the movies), and then I thought, I shouldnt expect too much.. just wait and watch..Then the bride really walked down in white saree with a guy, whom I thought was supposed to be her husband. But then it turned out that he was the Pastor (a clergyman or priest in charge of a congregation- Source: dictionary.com), and a good friend of the actual bridegroom.

Then began the sensational talk by the Pastor. I didnt know who he was; I just thought he was the groom's friend.. but later learnt he was 'professional' and the Pastor. I probably felt it was sensational, because I didnt expect that kind of an event to happen there and that kind of a topic being spoken on a wedding day!

Anyway, here it goes..
"If you would remember God everyday in your life, you would have a great marriage. When you are closer to God, we experience love, we experience peace so that we can give it to others..But theres something wrong with human race today, that there is one thing that sticks out- ' I'..We are all about 'me'. In marriage, most of the times, its about me, whats in it for me. Every problem is because I am selfish. But the Bible says, the love of God is not selfish. It is kind and forgiving. The love of God doesnt keep a record, it doesnt say, 'hold on, I remember what you did to me five years ago, you did this to me yesterday'.. the love of God says- 'Jesus paid for you on the cross and I dont remember anything' Because of being selfish, sin came in to the world and death came in to the world"

"Btw, friends, I dont know who you are today. You may be here tonight, but you are going to die one day. 100 years from now you are not gonna be here. What a horrible topic to talk on a wedding morning! Yeah, but that is the reality.  Every one of us are gonna die one day. We are going to grow older and older and I promise you, not one of us will be here, one hundred years from now..But you are gonna be somewhere. Your soul will be somewhere- either in heaven with God or in hell. The Bible is that clear about it. And the bad news is that we are all sinners. The Bible says that St.Paul said- all men are sinners, no man is perfect, none of us are without sin. All of us fall short of God's standard. We have all made mistakes in our lives. Not one of us is worthy, when we die, to stand before the gates of heaven and say that 'I am here, perfect, am a good man, I have never sinned'. Not one of us is able to say that. But the good news is this- the Gospel of Jesus is this-' that the God sent his son, Jesus Christ, the only one who is perfectly holy and sinless. Jesus on the cross took your sins on him. He was not dying as an accident. Jesus was dying so that you could be in heaven one day..If you accept him as your Lord, you will be saved.......
....Do you know where you will go when you die? Have you personally asked God to come in to your life? Have you asked, God, forgive my sins? If you have done that, you will be saved."

"The love that God wants through this marriage is supernatural love between you; that you may live your life, through the love of God. God has put love in man.. it goes beyond when you become old, when you have lost friends, when you have lost jobs and everything..Even when everything is gone, you can still say to each other-'I believe in you'.. Two imperfect people like all of us are, come together and plunge in love for God..This is a very sacred and holy moment. This is the time when Jesus is asking you-'Did you know you will have eternal life? If you believe in me, you will have everlasting life. Do you know where you will go when life will be over.' You might be saying-'who knows and who can know'. But the Bible says differently that those who believe in him, shall have everlasting life. Pray God to come into your lives as the holy spirit."

Many of those sentences were very touching for me.. two of them stand out:
1. "All of us fall short of God's standard."
2. "Not one of us is worthy, when we die, to stand before the gates of heaven and say that 'I am here, perfect, am a good man, I have never sinned'".. I got tears in my eyes as he was saying this..

I wanted to hear more and more.. As I heard him, I felt he was explaining the essence of marriage, as it is supposed to be. Maybe, we too have the mantras and chants etc., which convey much deeper meaning.. but nevertheless, this was a different experience.

And towards the end, I felt that their belief in God was much stronger than the belief I had. Then I thought I shouldn't have compared cultures initially.. since all religions talk about that same goal, just tuned to the different mindsets of people.